Like the leaves from the palm tree, her stretched hair rustled in the breeze, and with her plush Minnie Mouse slippers, she sprung off the moonlit porch. She was swinging on the porch swing in her shiny, silk, pink pajamas. She looked around at the quiet homes and was reminded that it was past her bedtime; which made the night even more curiosity.
She swung a few more swings, still waiting on her mama. Remi scooted off the swing, took one plush step to the iron screen door, and whined “Mama c’mon! Dey gonna close!” Her mama slapped back, “I’m comin’!” And with a worried hiss, “And lower ya voice. It’s late.” Remi’s bouncing anticipation became a dribble. She wouldn’t want to ruin the success of her “chocolate brown puppy eyes attack!” Especially since she knew her mother didn’t want to leave the comfort of her bed. But it was one of those delightfully quiet nights that needed to be explored.
Leaving only a dim lamp light on to welcome them home, her mama locked the front door and turned to see Remi staring up at the sky. She was spinning on the pedestal of the curved stoop, as if an alien spaceship was about to lift her up to the moon and take off.
In a whisper, Remi sang, “fightin’ evil by da moonlight, winnin’ love by da daylight, never runnin’ from a real fight, she is the one named sailor moo-!”
“Where is your bonnet?” Mama asked.
Like a string being cut, Remi came back to Earth. Her mama was behind her before she knew it, sliding the silk bonnet over hair. Snug and tight around her edges. “Now we can go.” Mama teased.
The car cruised through the neighborhood of bungalow homes; winding past potholes, slowing over oak tree branches that uprooted the gravel, but canopied the street in picturesque fashion. Remi’s car seat allowed her to see the passing sights.
“Mama, look! Mrs. Morris got new balloons! Remi exclaimed.
Coming up on a barely visible house, glowing, over-sized blow-ups paraded in a iron-fenced courtyard. They were packed upon each other, illuminating the house as if a theatrical show was about to begin. The new inflatable Mickey Mouse was dressed as a vampire, Snoopy sat atop a pumpkin, and the owner’s usual Halloween themed blow ups filled whatever empty space was left.
“Her light bill probably high.” Mama noted.
Remi eyes glittered at the uniqueness of the house. The lights and costumed characters made Remi giddy for the magical day. She thought of how happy Mrs. Morris would be when she saw Remi come up for her candy in her blond wig, silver tiara, and long white gloves. “Oh you look so beautiful!” She might say, and this made Remi happy, until she remembered.
“Mama, are we there yet?” Remi asked with an increasing heart beat.
“Blockbuster doesn’t close till twelve, we got time.” Mama replied with calm reassurance.
Passing up her favorite house, the car slowed down upon a simple, yellow cube at the corner of the block. Remi knew this place, even if she didn’t know how close it was to her house. It was the neighborhood corner store. Mama turned the ignition off, unbuckled herself, and rolled up the window while saying, “You can pick out some snacks from here. Only one. Okay?”
Remi huffed. “Okay.”
Restrained by age and height to lip off about the terrible snacks the store had, Remi didn’t fuss. Mama came around the car and opened the door. Remi unbuckled herself and held her mama’s hand to jump out onto the cracked pavement.
The silver bell chimed, signaling customers had arrived. Short rows stacked with different brands of bread, canned goods, TV dinners, cereals, chips, and candies made up the middle of the store, leading to the closed deli in the back. Along one wall, freezers held rainbow colored sodas, leading down to alcohol, then milk and eggs. The other wall, a see-through fort that displayed cigarettes and lottery tickets, was where the owner would usually sit.
“Get what’cha want.” Mama said as she went down the freezer to get eggs.
Remi noticed the sad display unusual candy. Not what Remi wanted. Her slippers plushed their way to the chip section irritated.
“Hey.” Mama said with “the voice.”
Remi knew this voice. A voice Remi noticed her mama used when talking to people who weren’t the same color as them; her voice became softened and high-pitched. Remi guessed it must have been polite.
“How you doin tonight?” Lanh said.
“Good. ” Mama and Remi replied in unison.
“No work?” Lanh joked sleepily as he smiled down at Remi and checked out their items.
Remi smiled back.
“No.” Mama replied in an equally joking matter. “You know I would be in bed by now, but she got me up to go get this movie from…”
Boring grown-up talk forced Remi’s mind to focus on the things at her eye level. She walked over to the entrance and stared out the glass door to the empty street. Across the empty street, a double-sided house, like hers, was awake. With their porch light on, Remi could see the light silhouette of a woman and a man sitting on the stoop, their skin reflecting the shadows. Moonlight glowed off of them. A dot of orange sparked from their mouths, and when the dot moved, smoke glided up into the air, their voices boisterous without hiding their accents. Remi cracked the entrance to clearly hear what they were saying. The bell chimed.
“Wait Remi.” Mama called out.
Lanh handed Mama the plastic bag continuing their conversation. “It’s a good thing y’all came. I was just about to close. ” He took a step down from behind the fort and walked with Mama towards the entrance. Remi was surprised to see how short he was. He never really left from behind the fort.
“You’re closing early?” Mama asked.
“Yea. My wife doesn’t want me keeping the store open so late. We’ve had people lurking around.”
He held the door open for Mama and Remi.
“You serious?” Mama voice was relaxing back into her usual one.
Mama opened the back car door for Remi, helping her into the car-seat.
“Yea…y’all have a good night though.” Lanh said as he locked up.
Still holding the glass door, Lanh, raised an arm to greet the couple across the street. They didn’t wave back.
“You too.” Mama replied a bit too warmly.
As Mama started the ignition, she looked over at the couple on the stoop. She shook her head and pulled off. Remi wondered if they had did something wrong. Remi looked out her window to see Lanh pulling down a silver wall over the building. It looked like a metal fortress.
Passing up the shotgun homes, they moved on to the block of the two-story homes. Dream homes that had curtain-like oak trees perfectly framing them for a HGTV magazine. Crape myrtles sprinkled across the freshly cut grounds and on the stone pathways leading up to the varying candy colored front doors. Wreaths took over the doors as if each house was competing for who had the most ribbon. Porches wrapped around the side of homes with stairs leading up to outdoor swings, sofas, and plants ornamenting them in bohemian flair. These were the homes with bright green backyards, staircases that curved upwards like the one Cinderella came down, and pathways lit up.
These were the homes Remi wanted to live in, not her simple, straight-to-the-back home. But one thing did confuse Remi, the windows. She could see inside their homes. Inside, a bouquet of flowers on a dining table or living room could be seen. People walked around freely without concerns of viewers.
“Mama? Why don’t dose houses have blinds?” Remi pondered.
“Because rich white people don’t put up blinds in dey house. They want you to look inside.” Mama said as if this was a known fact.
“Oh.” Given an answer, Remi moved on to her next question.
“Why did your voice change?” She pressed.
“What’cha mean?” Mama asked, her attention mainly on quickly moving past the stop signs.
“With Mr. Lanh. Your voice was…” Remi couldn’t find the words to describe it so she said plainly, “like a white person.”
Mama chuckled.
“Dat’s my voice Remi. I just switch it up when I’m around certain people.” Mama stated.
“Why?” Remi asked with genuine curiosity.
“To be polite? To not be seen as ghetto, maybe.”
“Are you only polite to people don’t look like us?” Remi asked.
“No! It’s….umm, complicated.” Mama contemplated the question deeply. She didn’t have a simple answer. She was left stunned by her inability to respond, in only a way a child could make one lost for words. So she changed the subject.
“You decided on what’cha want to be for the Halloween party?” Mama asked.
“Uh, maybe Cinderella.”
“But you were Cinderella last year. Maybe you’d want to be another character?”
“Sailor Moon.” Remi replied instantly.
“You don’t wanna be anyone else, maybe someone black.” Mama hinted.
Remi thought. She tried to remember all of her favorite cartoon shows.
“I don’t know any.” Remi replied and went on to admiring the homes. Mama became silent for the remainder of the drive.
Remi crossed her eyes when they stopped at a street light. The red stop lights became little dots in her vision. Even though she had been warned that her eyes could get stuck like that, from time to time she would briefly try it. She saw double green dots as her mama began driving again. A few cars passed by, their yellow lights, then red back lights. Then she finally saw the colors she was waiting for. The yellow and blue sign that was like her wonderland, she released her crossed eyes to see a BLOCKBUSTER sign boldly welcome her back.
Mama pulled into the strip mall’s parking lot, right in front of the Blockbuster entrance. Remi clicked out of her seat belt, scooted off the car seat, and started to pull on the door handle that would not budge.
“Calm down, girl! ” Mama said as she opened the back door.
Remi rushed out of the car, leaving her mama behind as she opened one entrance, then the second. Inside, rows and rows and rows of plastic storybooks. Blue carpet that smelled like mildew and comforted her. She eyed the cashier who stared back confused and annoyed that a customer came in right before closing. She started to look around for the determined child’s parent.
Remi’s slippers scratched against carpet, which was probably creating a static charge, as she bee-lined to the spot. The corner of the store that was just for kids her age. She passed Barney movies, The Wiggles, Sesame Street, The Big Comfy Couch, the baby section; not tonight. Just a couple rows down and she could see the sign that she was in the most spectacular section of the whole store; anime. Then like the crystal compacts the Sailor Scouts used to transform, the Sailor Moon VHS cases appeared. Remi sat on the floor to see if her movie was there. She looked again. She looked down the row. Mama walked up to find Remi in her spot.
“You gotch’a’ movie?” Mama asked.
Remi dragged her heavy head up, looked at her mama with pleading eyes and said, “It’s not here.”
“We can ask the cashier, they might have it in returns. Com’on.”
Mama started for the front counter, and Remi followed behind like her baby duck.
The cashier dreamed of the clock hitting midnight, of starting her car’s ignition, driving a couple blocks, and unlocking the door to her cozy dorm room, just to wake up with a paycheck that’ll-
“Um excuse’ me.”
Her dream faded away when hearing the accent that constantly permeated her northern ears. She returned her attention to the customers with a practiced, “Yes, how may I help you?”
“Hey, my daughter couldn’t seem to find a Sailor Moon movie. What’s da name of the movie, Remi?”
The voice had returned, but Remi didn’t understand why her mama would use it on another black woman. One whose voice Remi found annoyingly “nosey.” It was as if she was holding her nose while talking, but Remi could see she wasn’t holding her nose.
“I don’t know. But it’s a yellow case.” Remi’s eyes holding onto hope.
“I know what you’re talking about. That’s the one when Reni gets stuck in a dream?”
Remi’s eye’s widen,then she said, “Uhuh!”
“Yea. A man rented it out earlier today.” The cashier stated.
Remi’s big eyes fell. Her body began to shake, her eyes began to blur from the hot tears swelling up. “Remi! Don’t start that cryin.” Mama painfully implored. “You can get one of the other boxes. Don’t dey have episodes on them?”
Remi, in a cracked, restrained voice replied, “I already watched dose.”
Exhaling Mama said, “Ah lord. I don’t know whatcha want me to do.”
The cashier, sensing the situation going south said, “Hey! Don’t cry!”
Remi peaked up at the cashier, examining the silver rings on her nose and eyebrows, then looking into her dark circled eyes. Remi thought she looked like one of those scary people who only wore black. She couldn’t think of the name they were called. “I could just put the movie on hold for you when it’s returned. Until then, I have a movie you might like.” Based off of her knowledge of Sailor Moon, Remi shook her head in agreement.
“Okay, we’ll do dat.” Mama said sounding more exhausted than Remi.
The cashier came from behind the counter, and went to the VHS boxes that were in the “Discount/Used” section. She grabbed a plain blue plastic case, walked up to Remi, and knelt down to her level, presenting the case.
“It’s Cinderella. Like the one on your shirt, but she looks like you.”
The plastic box had a brown girl wearing a sparkly baby blue gown, with a crystal tiara atop her braided hair, and standing on a grand curved staircase. Remi was intrigued. She studied the image.
“Is she ghetto?”
“Huh? No.” The cashier was taken back.
Mama chuckled trying to play off her child’s bluntness. “Why would you say that Remi?” Remi peered up at her mama, looking to see if she should honestly answer that. Mama swatted the look away by shaking her head.
“The actress’s name is Brandy. She looks a little bit like you. Don’t you think?”
“She’s pretty. But she’s not Sailor Moon.”
“Well, no, she isn’t. She won’t save the world like Sailor Moon, but she has dreams too. She’s not a princess from the moon, but she becomes one from Earth. You might find something in common with her.”
A release was felt. Mama had to wipe the single tear that escaped before she asking Remi.
“Well, do you want it, Remi?”
Remi held the videotape box the cashier handed her. She was hesitant about taking the movie home. It wasn’t what she came for, and that alone made her feel like she had to settle for less.
“I’ll watch it.” Remi said.
Remi couldn’t just refuse the woman’s kindness. It might upset her.
“Good. How much is it?” Mama asked the cashier.
The cashier took the price sticker off of the box, and handed it back to Remi. “Don’t worry about it. It’s been in that basket for a minute anyway. It’s a gift from one student to another.” The cashier pointed to Mama’s deep green Tulane shirt, then to the same colored lanyard hanging around her neck.
“And also a gift from one Sailor Moon fan to another.” The cashier emphasized to Remi.
“What do you say, Remi?” Mama implied.
“Thank you,” Remi replied dryly, following her mama’s lead.
“No problem.” The cashier waved it off as she began to shut the store down for the night.
Driving home, Mama could sense the joy missing from the backseat. “Wasn’t dat nice of her to give you dat movie?”
“Can’t she get in trouble for dat?” Remi replied, thinking of a classmate who had his parents called after he got caught stealing a Lunchable from another student’s lunchbox.
“Well, I’m sure she wouldn’t have given it to ya if she knew she could get in trouble.”
Remi looked down at the Cinderella case.
“We’ll go get da Sailor Moon movie next week?” Remi asked, thinking that the selfish man couldn’t hold on to her movie longer than that.
“They’ll call me when they have it.”
Mama’s car pulled up a couple steps away from their humble little bungalow stoop. She turned the ignition off, returning them back to the quietness that surrounded their sleepy block. Mama turned around, knowing what would brighten Remi’s cute sullen face.
“Try da movie out Remi. You might be surprised. I’ll even watch it with you. ”
Remi’s smile returned.
“You can’t fall asleep!”
“Remi, I stay up all night. I won’t be noddin’ off until like two o’clock.” Mama teased.
In the small front room, lit dimly by a sofa lamp, and cooled by a clunky metal air conditioner, Mama was laid back, mouth opened, and snoring on the thick brown sofa. Remi laid on her mama’s chest, intensely watching the television underneath their fluffy gray cover. The time on the VCR was at 3:15 A.M. As the credits began to run on the movie, Remi shuffled off of the sofa, pressed rewind on the VCR and waited for the “click” indicating that she could watch the movie again, for a second time.
Brianna B. McManus 